And now, a word from our dearly departed colleague John Beck:
While it may seem totally coincidental that the same weekend the “midget wrestlers” come to town, I suddenly disappear – I must confess it’s not.
Try as I may, it’s become impossible to cover this up any more. Yes, it’s true my freewheeling license as Press Democrat entertainment writer has been revoked, and I’ve taken a job as head publicist for the Micro Wrestling Federation.
It turns out that I’m the only reporter in the country to write a section-front story devoted to their cause and the Press Democrat the only paper ever to run a two-column, reverse-type A1 tease and www.pressdemocrat.com the only website in the world to tease the hed “Dwarf Tossing” on the website (I have a PDF of the page if you don’t believe me).
These seemingly impossible feats of taste and investigative journalism (I discovered that the 4-foot-6-inch Meatball weighed 292 pounds instead of the 275 listed in his bio) simply could not be ignored.
In other words, keep us in mind for your next birthday party, bar mitzvah or mud wrestling event.
And while I personally apologize for not stopping by each and every one of your desks to regale you with the news of my sudden departure, know that you can always reach me at
illmissbobswoffordthemost@gmail.com – what you think I’m kidding? Try it, I dare you.